We usually expect others to do a good job for us, for example when we pay for a service. We expect others to treat us with respect, as well. But if that’s what we expect from others, we should make sure to do the same ourselves. So we need to do our best for others, treating them respectfully anytime and doing a good job for them when providing a service. This idea is known as the “Golden Rule” and is mentioned in the Bible, basically saying to do to others the things you would want them to do to you.
An article on Wikipedia about the Golden Rule cites a number of similar concepts from various religions and cultures. The idea has clearly been around for a long time and must have seemed obvious enough to many people that it arose in many cultures and religions in human history. In a sense, there is a sort of unanimous agreement throughout human cultures (or a broad divine revelation across cultures) that we must treat each other in good ways for a society to function well.
Perhaps it’s no wonder that the Golden Rule has been rediscovered in many cultures, since we can apply this idea to so many areas of our lives where we interact with others. For example, it could be applied to greeting each other when we see each other. Or it could be applied to the way we drive on the roads. It certainly can be applied to business deals. And of course it can apply to how we treat our spouse or children.
In applying the principle, there are two levels we can consider. One is a very specific, one-for-one way of looking at the actions we might do. But there is another level we sometimes may not consider. Looking at an example of the more specific actions, maybe we would like it if someone gave us a freshly baked loaf of banana bread. So, at this level of interpreting the Golden Rule, we might decide to give a loaf of banana bread to someone else. This is the most basic level of this idea.
But an important, higher level of the principle is to consider if that specific action would please the other person as it would me. Using the same scenario above, perhaps you know the other person is gluten-intolerant and doesn’t really like bananas. In this case the thing you would like to receive might be viewed as rude or unpleasant to this other person. So now we must look at how the other person might perceive our action. Will doing this thing for this person make them feel good, like I would want to feel from someone’s actions toward me? It means knowing people a little deeper and using a little more judgment. Or in the case where we don’t know the person at all, it may mean choosing an action that is more universally accepted by others than what we might actually prefer to do. This is the case when in public places, like stores, or on the road.
So we strive to treat others well and we expect others to treat us well, too. This reciprocity helps create a unity that we need. People can get along and work together better in such a situation. But in the rush of daily life, we may not always be our best toward others. Or perhaps we misunderstand the situation, so we give a response that causes hurt to someone. A number of situations can lead to less than the ideal of how we treat each other. And it happens with all of us. This leads to another area where we must apply the Golden Rule. If we mess up and hurt someone, we would hope they would forgive us, rather than hold a grudge or attempt to hurt us back. But then, we need to do the same for others–forgive them for falling short of this ideal way of treating people.
Associations with other people can be complex and difficult, but we need to do our best and give people the benefit of the doubt and be willing to forgive. This is living in the light.
Emil